Arpita Sarkar
Asked November 04, 2016

Mental harassment by brother

  • 3 Answers
  • 6433 Views

I was divorced in 2004 from my arranged marriage. I have a brother 12 years younger to me. After divorce I came back home where both parents were alive. My brother became an engineer and by now very much well established by himself in a big MNC in Delhi. I am a physician and at the same time suffering from on and off depressions related to my loneliness and career setback due to broken marriage. I somehow did my MD with help of my mother who willfully gave her pension money to support me during my MD years. Problem started from there, previously my brother used to verbally abuse my dad, who was diagnosed with cancer and was in depression. brother told over phone to dad that he will not come to do the rituals when dad will die and that made my dad stunned. And in reality too, he was sleeping in Delhi and I was struggling with my dying dad in ICCU in AMRI hospital in front of me. When I informed that it seems dad will pass away in next 2 or 3 hours, he told me over phone not to disturb him. He put the phone in silent mode. Immediately I called him helplessly when dad died but he didn't pick it up. that is in 2010. In 2011 i went to study MD outside West Bengal. I was alone, in a new unknown place. the only support system was my mom. That time mom regularly used to cry and tell me that how brother was verbally abusing her for not arranging for his marriage. At the same time he also started throwing me sms everyday and night regarding why I am taking money from mother. I went into severe depression and was under treatment in NIMHANS where it is still in record how my brother was affecting me. He got married then. Now I have got a job in my field of microbiology after so much struggle and the first salary on the way to come from this new job. I am again getting his abusive sms at late night telling the same thing. He told me in sms that I am mentally damaged. yesterday he told in sms that following my tantrums in my native place, neighbors are also behaving strangely with him. My mother's role in all these is also very much confusing to me. I know if I take legal action for mentally harassing me against brother then she will either become silent or will talk for my brother as she always very much concerned about 'family prestige' issue. By now honestly I am so much scared of my brother. yesterday sms just bringing into me another episode of severe depression. I have no boyfriend or anybody here to help me. last episodes of depression in MD time stopped me from going to college. how can I take legal help to make him scared to stop?...please help! I am 43, divorcee and alone in rajasthan.

Answers 3

First of all, being a highly educated independent woman, please be bold and have faith in God particularly when you do not want to take any legal action.  If nothing else, you may write a soft letter under acknowledgment to your brother asking him to restrain himself from sending you messages or else you will take legal action. 

Agree Comment 0 Agrees almost 4 years ago

first offer thanks to God that you fulfilled your and your father's ambition of becoming a physician. Don't feel alone wherever you are. God has given you skill to serve masses. Feel proud that you are in list of few thousand persons in India's 1.25 million population who are blessed with medical degrees.

by remaining with your father, during his last days, you proved that daughters are not less than son and they can perform all at par with sons. you are fortunate to help  and serve your father. it is your brother's bad luck because of  which he failed to remain with his father in his dire need.

Make your mind strong so that you shall be able to overlook such sms.  Be out of depression and for that if you require to meet any Psychologist or counsellor, do meet him. Forgive your brother for his misdeeds and misbehaviour with you. your lovely behaviour and forggiveness may change his feeling towards you , but proceeding legally, will definitely sour  your relations.

If you still feel to take a revenge from your brother or teach him a lesson, you can get issue (i) notice for his abusive/ undesired SMS (ii) file suit for partition of fathers property.

But please don't forget that once you issue legal process, the chances of his positive change will be remote or will take a decade. so what do your feel better today ?. write it in a diary and re-consider your thought after 90 days and listen to your conscious and proceed accordingly.

Join any religious preaching centre near your area. meet persons who have positive approach. In case, you feel to meet me for further discussions, you are welcome and I am at Mumbai.

Agree Comment 0 Agrees almost 4 years ago

If your brother has said harassing words in front of someone else too you can charge him with 499 along with section 503, 509 of IPC[1]. If he has threaten you with any injury to you or to your reputation then as the means of avoiding the execution of such threat, your brother has committed the crime of criminal intimidation and liable for a punishment over the same under section 506. Also you have section 294 as a mean of protection from verbal abuse by your brother.[2]

Also in Jaichand vs State Of Maharashtra,[3] Bombay High Court in 2011 has held that abusing or using filthy language to annoy someone is an offence under section 294, even if it does not take place in a public place.

If the local police doesn't act on the complaint then you can file case under section156 (3) CrPc in the nearest magistrate.

Also I would advice you to collect all the evidence about verbal and mental abuse and when you meet him try to record on camera or sound recoding for the benefit of the case.

Also you have file for a restraining order in the court, to stop your brother to contact you, either personally or through any other mode. For that you should apply to your local District Court for a restraining order to be made against the person harassing you i.e. your brother. The application is made "on notice", which means that the respondent is notified about your application. The court will hold a hearing, and the respondent is entitled to attend and be heard there.

Because it is your brother you are covered by the protection offered under the DOMESTIC VIOLENCE ACT 1995 (see How to obtain a protection order under the Domestic Violence Act)

 

You can also ask the court for a Protective Order that will order the abuser to stop abusing you; Tell the abuser to leave and stay away from your home, work place, and family; Direct the abuser to have no contact with you, including no phone calls, letters, or messages through other people

 

[1] 509. Word, gesture or act intended to insult the modesty of a woman.- Whoever, intending to insult the modesty of any woman, utters any word, makes any sound or gesture, or exhibits any object, intending that such word or sound shall be heard, or that such gesture or object shall be seen, by such woman, or intrudes upon the privacy of such woman, shall be punished with simple imprisonment for a term which may extend to one year, or with fine, or with both.

 

[2]

294. Obscene acts and songs.- Whoever, to the annoyance of others-- (a) does any obscene act in any public place, or

(b) sings, recites or utters any obscene song, ballad or words, in or near any public place,

shall be punished with imprisonment of either description for a term which may extend to three months, or with fine, or with both.

 

 

 

[3]https://indiankanoon.org/doc/468615/

Agree Comment 0 Agrees almost 4 years ago

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